Wednesday, 18 February 2009


It was just one of those things, or was it? Sometime last week, I can't remember exactly when, but Jayne and I picked Chelsey up from work, oh yes it was Wednesday. "Can I have a Mcdonalds please" Oh crap i thought, I knew that this meant "Drive through". Panic stations, anxiety and stress kicks in, ably unsupported by Jayne "Do you want me to do the drive through ?" Not the encouragement i was desperate for. Soldier on.Got to the order window and managed to place Chelseys order, fantastic, part one of Mission McDonalds accomplished. Now just go to the collection window and Bingo, success. So what went wrong ? Young chap opens the window and tells me that the order won't be long. "O.K. me duck" in my best leicestershire accent. Jayne and Chelsey start laughing, and mimicking, ridiculing and generally taking the piss. Reign in all the stress, anger, frustration and panic. Then hallelujah, the order arrives. Pass it to the back seat to Chelsey, who checks it as I start to pull away, " This is the wrong order, I wanted a plain quarter pounder with cheese, this has got relish"
Wonderful, (deep sigh) " Back up to the window" in staggered unison. I obey. The young man has gone. "Knock on the window" says Chelsey. Again I obey, nobody home. "Sound your horn" this time in perfect unison.
Enough !!!! This was a bridge too far, the final straw. "NO" but this is not a car that is driven and in the control of HMV. So whilst I refuse to sound the horn, an action that screams attention to me, something that I find abhorrent. Jayne takes the decision to do the task "for me". Thank the Lord, still no reply, so making a decision for myself, round to the car park and take the order inside to change. "I'll do it" Jayne barks, obviously upset at my inability to be assertive and obtain control. In she marches and about 5 minutes later, she emerges victoriously, brandishing the trophy "McDonalduss correcterous".
"Thanks Mom" Says the grateful daughter of my loins. Off we go home, in strained silence. When we arrive and get sorted, Jayne lets me know how she feels, " I have had enough of you, I am going bed !" So although Jayne goes to bed, she does not go alone, she takes the Moral High ground with her.
Before, during and after the McDonalds incident, my Aspergers played havoc with me, and here we are a week later and it still is on my mind. Jayne has a good understanding of my issues and is well within her rights to "Explode" every now and then, I know that i am not the easiest person to live with and Aspergers can be a complete pain in the Arse.
Books are very thin on the ground at the moment, I have bid and failed on a Margery Allingham, a Ngaio Marsh and tonight an Anthony Gilbert. Never mind, all good things come to those who wait. After all it's not as if I have nothing to read right now.

Gladys Mitchell, "The Crooking Raven" First U.K. edition, published by Michael Joseph, 1966, p214, jacket by Broom Lynne.

Gladys Mitchell "Skeleton Island" First U.K. edition, published by Michael Joseph, 1967, p213, jacket by Broom Lynne.

Ngaio Marsh "False Scent" First U.K. edition, published by Collins for the Crime Club. 1960, p254.